When the way forward requires looking back
The wisdom of the sankofa
At the end of the year, people love to do look-backs. In the last few weeks, I've seen collections of the best photos of the year, the best moments on social media, the best articles, the best books, the best cookies. I'm not going to lie, I enjoy stepping back and taking in everything that has happened in 2023. I find myself thinking: That really happened this year? It feels like it was ages ago! Sometimes I cringe: Oof, that was a train wreck, and I hope we learned some collective lessons.
This happens every year. And it’s more than just a way to mark the passage the time; there can be value in looking back before we look forward. I came across an article from last year in the Harvard Business Review by Ranjay Gulati that explored how – for businesses – it can be hugely valuable to take stock of the past. The businesses that use their corporate history to inform future decisions often have a leg up on their peers. I found this observation to be true of our personal lives as well.
Sometimes, in our eagerness to move forward, we ignore past successes and failures. It’s a new year, a new me! We act as if the new year magically brings a clean slate, giving us everything we need to make better decisions. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to point out the folly in that line of thinking. Our previous decisions very much influence our future trajectory, for better or worse. We don't want to dwell on our past failings. But at the same time, if we allow ourselves the time and space to reflect, our past experiences can be transformed into wisdom. It's about finding the balance between nostalgia – yearning for the rosy days of yore – and wanting to grow and evolve for the future. In the HBR article, Ranjay, a professor at Harvard Business School, writes:
When explaining this idea to CEOs and their teams, I often refer to the sankofa, a mythical bird from Ghanaian folklore that is typically portrayed as twisting its head backward to secure a precious egg while keeping its feet facing forward. Indeed, the word sankofa (which comes to us from the Akan tribe) can be translated as “go back to the past and bring forward that which is useful.”
One of the ways companies achieve this best is by leaning into "their founding ethos and spirit" and using that to making sure their modern-day goals are in alignment. I read that as: what are your values and how are you living into them? In what ways are making decisions that align with the way you want to live your life?
In Ranjay's time studying corporate culture and what makes companies successful, he identified four markers that set successful companies apart. I found that many of these practices have also set me up for a fruitful life.
Conduct a thorough historical audit: what elements from the past helped you, and which should be let go?
Translate those past experiences into future action: how can what you learned inform future decisions you make?
Galvanize the organization around those efforts: who are the people that can cheer you on and support you in these goals?
Continually reexamine and reflect: are these adjustments helping? If not, adjust some more.
I'm not really big into New Year's resolutions – that's perhaps a Messay for another day – but I'm big on taking the time to both look back and look ahead whenever there's an opportunity. As we round out the year with holidays, celebrations, down-time, or simply flipping the switch on a new year, I'll be taking time to look back on my own big moments: what were the hardest parts of 2023? Some of the most rewarding? Where did I feel the most love, and what relationships did I miss? Are there things I need to let go, or things I want to make more of a priority? What excites me the most about 2024? What dreams do I have for this bright and shiny new year?
I love to spend time reflecting on these things by myself, but I also love to reflect on them with others. In sharing them with my husband, it's exciting to see how much he remembers that I've forgotten, the challenges we faced, or the connection we feel when we share the same dreams. But all in all, my favorite part of these reflections boils down to one sentence: look how far we’ve come. Whether it’s been a year full of plenty or one of much struggle (often both), it’s amazing to see the strength, courage, and love that permeated it all.
There’s a lot of wisdom to gain from the sankofa, if nothing more than to pause for a moment see what amazing creatures we humans are.
Small victories 🏅
We have (almost) made it to the end of another year! Whether it’s been one filled with the smallest of victories or the biggest, it was also a year of overcoming challenges of every size. Cheers to all of us 🥂
Hot mess recs 🔥
Remember that list of cookies I mentioned? I was referring to Cookie Week 2023 from the New York Times (not technically a recap, but pretty dang close). While they all sound yummy, I can personally vouch for the Mexican Hot Chocolate cookies. They are divine.
During the holidays, thoughts often turn to home. What does home look like, feel like, embody? The Christian Science Monitor published a series of vignettes (mine included!) asking folks to share what home means to them. Check out the collection if you’re looking to “kindle the warmth of home in your heart.”
On the third Sunday of the month, Jess and a few friends gather at one of their homes for a potluck. The host gets to pick a theme, and everyone brings a dish that reflects their interpretation of that theme. They call it Feeding Friends – and it’s been one of the highlights of Jess’s year. Though they definitely missed a few months (mostly in late summer/early fall), having a regular excuse to come together, share food and recipes, and catch up with one another has been incredibly special. She highly recommends setting up your own version in 2024!
Send us a note 💌
Thank you for supporting The Mess with Sam and Jess for the year of 2023! We are so grateful for your support and love hearing from you. If you want to spread the love, forward this email along to a few friends. We’re always looking to grow our little community.
Enjoy the holidays, and we’ll see you next year!
Sam